2. June 2026

My First Sober Holiday Abroad: What I Gained When Alcohol Wasn't Invited

I’ve recently returned from my first sober holiday abroad.

And it was a very special event! It was a family holiday with my partner and our two boys, my parents, my sister, her husband, and their baby. We had all been looking forward to it for months as it was a celebration for my Dad’s birthday.

The focus of the holiday was simple: spending quality time together, making memories, and relaxing.

But as I reflected on the trip, I realised something important.

If I was still drinking, the focus of my holiday would have been completely different.

I know exactly how it would have gone.

Before we’d even arrived, I’d have been thinking about the cold beers, the Aperol spritzes, the champagne by the pool. Drinking would have dominated the space in my mind.

Each day would have started groggy and tired. Checking through a hazy memory of “how much did I drink last night?” My partner would almost certainly have been the one getting up first with the children while I tried to recover. I'd have felt guilty, but also resentful. He'd have been frustrated that I wasn't fully present, and I'd have convinced myself he was spoiling the fun.

Then the mental gymnastics would begin.

Maybe I won’t drink today.

How long until I can have another drink?

Would lunchtime be acceptable?

Should I wait until the afternoon?

The thought process would have dominated my day.

The irony is that I would have believed alcohol was helping me relax, while in reality it would have been taking up an enormous amount of mental energy and taken me further away from the experiences around me.

I would have wanted late nights. I would probably have persuaded my partner to leave the kids with family and come out for a "date night." But if I'm honest, the priority wouldn't have been quality time together. The priority would have been booze.

Can you hear how much alcohol would have dominated the entire holiday?

I would have poured so much energy into drinking, and it would have given very little back.

More importantly, it would have taken me away from the people who matter most.

Instead, the holiday unfolded very differently.

We shared a beautiful villa together and managed to do so harmoniously. I started several mornings with an early run. One day my son joined me, another day my partner came along.

Those runs were very special moments of the holiday.

We explored together, chatted, laughed, and connected in a way that felt genuinely special.

Throughout the trip, my focus wasn't on drinking. It was on my family.

Playing with the children.

Looking after one another.

Going on little adventures.

Being present.

And enjoying lots of delicious food!

One day we took a boat trip along the coast. The crew made a very convincing sales pitch for their sangria. Apparently it was award-winning.

I have to admit, it sounded tempting.

Had I still been drinking, I'd have been all over it.

But I also know that drinking it would have taken me away from the beauty of the experience itself.

During the trip we had the opportunity to jump off the boat into the sea. It was challenging!

Alcohol would probably have made the jump easier.

But doing it sober made it infinitely more rewarding.

When I finally leapt into the water, I felt an enormous sense of achievement. It wasn't the jump itself that mattered. It was proving to myself that I could face discomfort and fear without needing alcohol to soften the edges.

And that's what alcohol-free living is really about.

It's about building trust in yourself.

It's recognising that some things feel uncomfortable, doing them anyway, and discovering that you're capable of far more than you thought.

Every time you face a challenge sober, you build a little more confidence. A little more resilience. A little more mental strength.

And over time, the next challenge feels easier.

But the benefits go beyond confidence.

Without alcohol, you begin to know yourself on a deeper level.

You start paying attention to what scares you and why.

You become curious about your emotions instead of trying to numb them.

When difficult feelings arise, you learn to ask yourself what you actually need.

(Hint: it's not a drink!)

You begin to appreciate simple moments more deeply.

The conversations.

The connections.

The quiet mornings.

The sunsets.

The memories.

The acts of giving.

Towards the end of the holiday, my parents practically forced me and Si to go out for an evening together.

We had a lovely meal overlooking the marina. We people-watched, wandered around, and talked about how different the evening would have been if alcohol had been involved.

Previously, we would probably have stayed out much later.

We'd have drunk way too much.

We wouldn’t have truly connected.

Instead, we headed back at a reasonable time.

The boys were still awake.

They were excited to see us, and we were excited to see them.

We slept well, woke refreshed, and were ready for our next adventure…kayaking with the boys along the coastline.

It was one of those experiences that will stay with us forever.

Had I been hungover, I doubt I would have enjoyed it (it may not have even happened). My anxiety would have been higher, my patience lower, and I would have been focused on getting through it rather than embracing it.

Instead, we approached it with a sense of adventure and calm confidence.

We created a memory that will last a lifetime.

The boys also went to a water park with their dad and uncle. Honestly? I knew my limits. I would have hated it.

But one of the gifts of sobriety is knowing yourself well enough to make decisions without guilt.

I'd already spent quality time with them throughout the holiday. I knew they would have a brilliant day without me.

So while they flew down slides and burned off energy, I finished my book by the pool and enjoyed some genuine rest.

Then I welcomed them back, excited to hear every detail of their adventure.

That's something alcohol never gave me.

Presence.

Contentment.

Confidence in my decisions.

Peace.

When I look back at this holiday, I don't see what I missed out on.

I see everything I gained.

How many cherished memories does alcohol really offer us?

What it offers in the moment, it often takes back with interest later.

If you're reading this and a small part of you is wondering whether your life could be richer, calmer, and more fulfilling without alcohol, I encourage you to give it a try.

Not because it's easy.

It isn't.

It takes effort, consistency, and a willingness to sit with discomfort.

But the rewards are immense.

You put the work in, and sobriety pays you back tenfold.

Alcohol takes far more than it gives.

And the people who often pay the highest price are the ones we love most.

This holiday reminded me of something I never want to forget:

The best moments in life don't need alcohol.

In fact, they're often better without it!